Letter to Robert Olsen Inc and Kahan Law Firm

Dear Rob (Robert Olsen Inc) and Bob (Kahan Law Firm),

Dr. Olsen's office so seldom responds to communications or follows through on promises that sending emails, writing letters, etc., is usually a poor use of my time. Olsen's Foibles remedies that situation. Instead of typing over and over again information that's going to be ignored, I can simply link to it.

Bob, you'll probably want to read Kahan News! Exclusive to Olsen's Foibles!.

Vicky will want to read Vicky the Overbooker.

Rob, you and Dr. Olsen should probably read the whole blog. Not all the posts are on the first page; use the navigation bar on the right.

Despite the name "Olsen's Foibles" we look forward to publishing good experiences people have had with Robert Olsen Inc as well as our own unfortunately mostly bad ones. I hope you appreciate Olsen's Foibles in the humorous sense in which it is intended. The blog is therapeutic for me. If I didn't laugh about this I'd have to cry.

Best regards,

Jason

PROTIP

Yes, it's a PROTIP for the Olsen staff!

As it became clear that Dr. Olsen cannot be bothered with such trivialities as addresses, I wrote the Olsen staff a letter from which I will quote only the last paragraph:

PROTIP: If a client tells you even once that they did not receive documents you sent, check their mailing address. Don't wait for them to insist you read it back to them, and then heave a sigh to let them know you're merely indulging them.

New answering machine message!

I highly recommend Robert Olsen Inc's new answering machine message. I'll give you the number so that you can hear the hapless old fellow's voice for yourself, but first let me give some background.

The previous version of the message had been recorded by his secretary Rob. It was a straightforward and workmanlike message. Its one small flaw was that it did give incorrect office hours (or hours different from those supplied by the urgent message operator).

The problem was not with the message itself, but with the fact that Robert Olsen Inc never answers the phone and seldom returns calls left on their answering machine. As a result, callers tended to press "0" as instructed to reach the (non-emergency) urgent message operator. While this was only marginally more effective in eliciting a response from Robert Olsen Inc, it did at least offer a human voice to assure one that one's message had been successfully transmitted.

This over-use of the urgent message operator apparently threw Dr. Olsen into a fit. "I'll do it myself!" he must have shouted, erasing poor Rob's serviceable version and replacing it with his own.

Ok. Now listen to the message. Don't worry, there is no chance whatsoever that a person will answer the phone.

(206) 622-5455

Note the inappropriate tone of voice used in the "apology". He certainly doesn't sound sorry that his office never returns calls, does he? I'd call that tone of voice "indignant" if not "ill-concealed rage" but give it a try and see what you think.

His vocal cord tension reaches dangerous levels when he begins schooling his callers on when it is and isn't appropriate to dial "0" for the urgent message line.

It just goes to show, just because you're a psychiatrist doesn't mean you have any self-awareness at all.

Enjoy it now, because I can't see a message like that lasting forever.

An invitation to fans of Dr. Robert Olsen

Our own opinion of Robert Olsen Inc., as readers will infer, is that it's the Keystone Kops of the psychiatric world. But we strive for balance and fairness, and certainly hope that some readers will have had positive experiences with Dr. Olsen and will tell us about them.

Dr. Robert Olsen and his staff are also encouraged to comment!

Editorial policy

This is a blog, not a newspaper. I go back and make updates, corrections and improvements to older posts from time to time; and I do it without comment unless there is some reason to call attention to it.

So far, we have had no reader comments, but comments are welcome. I like to have comments unmoderated for instant posting. Provided your comment is about Dr. Robert Olsen and his staff, and isn't legally problematic, it'll probably be fine.

Waiting for your call

On Wednesday, May 19th, just after noon, Dr. Olsen's secretary Rob emailed me

I would like you and Dr. Olsen to have a telephone conversation about your case and where we are to go from here. I would be happy to give you a call tommorow [sic] and setup [sic] an appointment time. I think it would be beneficial to the situation for that to happen. Please send a reply indicating whether that would be acceptable to you. Thank you.

to which I responded exactly seven minutes later

Rob,

A phone conversation would be wonderful!
Thanks.

Jason

What a wallflower I felt like, waiting all day Thursday and Friday for the phone call that never came!

Will Rob ever call to set up the telephone appointment? Readers of Olsen's Foibles will know that it's not a forgone conclusion. Not by any means. We will, of course, keep you posted.

Hat tip to Valkyrie's Life for the graphic.

Dr. Olsen's malpractice insurer?

Dr. Olsen's secretary, Rob, tells me "I will have to ask Dr. Olsen if I can give you any information on that."

You do that, Rob!